The Need To Go Home
by jaskmi
Summary: Joe wants to go home, but is not sure Adam feels the same. My very first story, I hope you will enjoy


The Need To Go Home!

By Jaskmi

As Joe drove the wagon toward Virginia City, his mind was in a whirl. He kept going over in his mind the events that happened almost two years ago. The fight with Adam, the things they said to each other, everything.

_Oh, how I wish I could take it all back!_ Joe thought to himself. He sighed as he looked in the back of the wagon. He needed to get home! Joe took the telegram from his pocket and read it again!

COME HOME IMMEDIATELY STOP.  
WIRING MONEY NOW STOP.  
WILL MEET YOU IN TOWN STOP.  
LOVE PA STOP.

Joe did not wait for the money to be wired he just packed up and headed for home. Dead tired, he mechanically drove the wagon to home, never stopping.

Six o'clock in the morning, Joe found himself in Virginia City. He found Sheriff Coffee leaving his house, getting ready for early morning rounds. "Well, Joe Cartwright as I live and breathe!"

Joe jumped down grabbing Roy's hand, shaking it vigorously. "Roy," he said in an exhausted voice.

"How ya been, boy?" said Roy smiling from ear to ear. He was with Ben when he got the wire from Joe. Roy had never seen Ben so excited, except when Adam was coming home from college.

Joe just looked over his shoulder at the wagon and smiled back at Roy. "Can I leave a very important bundle here Roy?" "Just for an hour or so till Pa gets into town?"

Roy helped Joe unload and the two of them headed into town. Roy went to the office first as he did every morning. Joe headed over to Daisy's for a cup of coffee, which he really needed. He walked the street, slowly looking around; it was as if nothing had changed since he left. Sipping his coffee slowly, he closed his eyes. God how he was tired. He did not know what he was going to say to his family when he met them, but he had to see them. All of them!

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Ben could hardly contain himself all morning. He was up at the crack of dawn pacing the floor and the yard all morning. All the ranch hands knew he was thrilled that Joe was coming home!

Once Adam and Hoss were up, they would head into town. He had already saddled their horses, so they would be ready by the time breakfast was done and they could leave for town.

Hoss was just as excited as Ben. Adam on the other hand was more reserved! He read Joe's telegram to Pa over and over.

PA NEED TO COME HOME, STOP

NEED TO TALK TO YOU, STOP

WILL WAIT FOR REPLY, STOP

LOVE JOE, STOP

He remembered the fight he and Joe had as if it was yesterday. Mimicking his brother's thoughts, _Boy I sure would like to take it all back!_

They all headed into town about six thirty and Ben was beaming. So was Hoss for that matter. Adam was happy Joe was coming home, but also a little nervous. What would he say to the boy? That's what Joe was, at least to Adam. Nineteen years old, yup just a boy.

Shaking his head trying to clear his thoughts, he really needed to see Joe to apologize to him. He knew it was his fault Joe had left, not that Adam didn't look everywhere he went for Joe, but he never found him. _Just where had he been?_ That's what Adam wanted to know. Little did he know that Joe was never really far away!

The Cartwrights pulled up in front of the Sheriffs office just as Roy was just coming out to do some rounds. "Ben, how are ya this morning, as if I don't already know?"

"Wonderful Roy, just wonderful" said Ben with a huge smile on his face. "Just killing some time before Joe gets in." "Roy, is the stage running on time today?" asked Ben.

Roy smiled knowing Ben thought Joe was on that stage, "Now why would you be waiting for the stage, and what are you doing in town at this hour, Ben?"

"You know full well, Roy!" Ben looked at Roy a little strange; he had this funny little smile he wore! "OK Roy, give it up, whats going on?"

"And don't try to tell me nothing, you have that funny look and…."As Roy burst out laughing, Ben stopped in mid sentence, frowning at Roy. "Ben don't look so upset. If you are looking for Little Joe, he's already in town"

Ben's mouth dropped open, as did Hoss' and Adam's. "What do you mean he's already in town?" asked Adam.

"Just what I said, Adam, he's already here!" "He dropped some things off at the house while he waited for all of ya to get here."

Ben shook his head, turned, and headed out, almost in a dead run towards Roy's house, with Adam and Hoss right on his heels.

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As they got closer to Roy's, Ben paused blinking his eyes as if they were playing tricks on him!

"What's wrong Pa?" asked Hoss. Ben just pointed, as Adam and Hoss looked down the street and noticed him.

The distinct green jacket, the way he walked! They both said "Joe" at the same time as they ran to him.

He was talking to Cora Milford, telling her he was in a hurry. "I'm sorry Ms. Cora, but I really need to be going. I'm going to meet my family!"

She looked over Joe's shoulder. "Why Little Joseph, they're right behind you!" she said with a big smile on her face.

Joe swallowed and turned to see his family there. "Pa" he said, trying to swallow the knot in his throat.

"Joseph," was all Ben could say as he pulled him into a fierce bear hug. Tears of joy were running down Ben's face as held Joe at arm's length to get a good look at him.

"How are you boy?" asked Ben in a husky voice.

"I'm fine, Pa!"

Hoss gave one loud whooping sound and picked Little Joe up, swinging him around, as if they were kids again. Joe was laughing and hugging Hoss as if his life depended on it.

He turned to Adam, swallowing another lump in his throat. "Adam," said Joe with tears in his eyes.

Adam just reached out, grabbing Joe and pulling him to his chest, and whispering in his ear. "Where the hell have you been? I've missed you, boy?" The tears just flowed as Joe squeezed Adam harder.

_Adam-oh thank god he doesn't hate me_, as he originally feared. "Adam, I…I'm so sorry," he whispered.

Adam just held him tighter. "I'm the one who needs to apologize Joe. We'll talk later."

"Ahem." Ben cleared his throat. The boys just looked at him, smiling. "What do you say we get this young man home?" Home, that word never sounded sweeter to Joe.

"I just have to stop back at Roy's and pick something up."

"Yeah, let me guess," said Adam rubbing his chin and smiling at Joe. "Some pretty little filly, right?" He said, teasing Joe with the biggest smile on his face.

Joe felt himself blushing. "She'll melt your heart!" was all Joe said.

Ben just shook his head, grabbed his neck gently, and said, "Well lead the way, Joseph." He could feel Joe shaking.

There was nothing but idle conversation on the way to Roy's house. _When we get home_ _there will be time to talk_, thought Ben. He noticed how exhausted the boy looked.

Martha Coffee had opened the door just as the four of them arrived. "Ben, Adam, Hoss. Come on in, coffee's all ready for all of you!" she said as she winked at Joe. He smiled and walked into the house first. They walked down the hallway into the living room.

Just as they entered, they heard, "DADDY" squealed by a small child!

"Oh my god," was all Ben could say.

Adam and Hoss just froze in place, as this beautiful little girl ran as fast as her little legs would go toward Joe.

He got down just in time to catch her as she flung herself at him. "Daddy, missed you," she almost shouted.

"Missed me, I wasn't even gone a half-hour!" laughed Joe as he kissed his baby.

"Yong time" she said in an excited voice, jumping up and down in Joe's arms.

Ben was at Joe's side in two steps, looking at this little angel. He had seen pictures of Marie when she was a little girl. _She was the spitting image of Marie_, but so was Joe, Ben reasoned.

"Pa, this is Jessica Marie Cartwright," said Joe with a little sad smile. "Jesse, this is your grandpa."

"Hello," Jesse said in a shy little voice, laying her head on Joe's shoulder.

Looking into those emerald eyes, Ben just stepped forward, taking the little girl in his arms and hugging her close. He could feel the tears running down his face. _She can't be more than a year old or so, _thought Ben_._

Adam and Hoss just stood there in shock with their mouths hanging open.

When Ben brought himself out of his thoughts, he found his voice, "Joe how…. where is the mother?" He looked around.

Joe sucked in a deep breath. He knew he was going to lose it any minute.

Adam stepped forward when he saw Joe sway and put his hand on his shoulder. "Joe, are you ok?"

Joe just shook his head. He couldn't even breathe, much less talk.

Jesse answered for him. "Mommy in hevin, her andel."

For the second time, Ben found himself saying _oh my god!_ She's in heaven…..she's an angel.

_Please, please tell me that I misunderstood the child! _Ben thought to himself. _So that's what he needed to talk to me about!_

Even Adam and Hoss closed their eyes, hoping the same thing as Ben. But with one look at Joe, they all knew that they had heard correctly.

Ben just turned to Adam. "Sweetheart, this is your Uncle Adam." He then handed the child to him. He grabbed Joe, who had his head down and was now crying, pulled him into his arms and held him. _No wonder the boy is exhausted!_

Thought Ben. Joe just collapsed in his father's arms. He sat him down on the sofa, seating himself next to him.

"What happened son?" said Ben as he caressed the boy's neck.

Thru his tears he answered, "She…she, cholera …th..the.. a lot of people died in Gold Hill, that's where I…. we.. were living for the last year. Her name was Katie, Katie McFadden." "You'd a loved her Pa, she was so beautiful!" Joe just buried his head in his hands and wept.

All Ben could do was hold his boy. "Hoss, would you please get the horses so we can head for home?"

"Yessir."

Adam whispered in his ear as he passed him to get Doc Martin and meet them at the house!

Hoss left with tears stinging his eyes. Roy had just shown up with the horses as Hoss stepped off the porch. "Thanks Roy," he said in a thick voice.

"No problem boy, everything's all set for you to take Joe home."

Hoss just shook his head, putting his large hand on Roy's shoulder to thank him. He was sure if he spoke nothing would come out.

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The ride home was mostly a blur to Joe. Ben drove the wagon with Joe, and the boy literally cried almost all the way home. Ben just talked to him softly. "Don't worry son, you're home now. Everything's going to be fine."

Ben wasn't even sure he believed his own words. He remembered losing all three of his wives and though the pain did lessen over time, it never fully went away. _Never._

He had always prayed that none of his sons would have to go through what he did. He looked over at Adam who was riding Sport with Jesse.

She was jabbering away and pointing at everything. She was so animated, Adam was just laughing away. Ben could hear Adam talking to her, saying as if he actually understood her, "Is that so?"

"Yeah" she squealed, "yook it!" She pointed towards the wood line.

Adam looked over and saw the doe standing near the edge of the woods. "Yes I see the deer."

"Bay-bee"

As he looked closer, he noticed the little fawn standing just a few feet from the mother. He smiled. "Yes, I see the baby."

Ben glanced back at Joe. Although he had stopped crying, he could still feel him shaking as he sat next to him. He put a reassuring hand on Joe's neck and gave a gentle squeeze as they pulled into the yard. "Come on Joe, let's get you inside."

Once Joe found himself inside, Ben brought him straight to his old room. It was as if nothing had changed. He looked around, and saw that his mother's photo was still there. "_Mamma_," he said, picking it up and holding it to his chest before collapsing on the bed.

Ben came in and looked at Joe lying there with his mother's picture and the sight made his heart ache.

Joe opened his eyes. "I…I wanted to come home but was scared you didn't want me!"

"Joe, don't you realize there is absolutely nothing that you could do to make me feel that way?" Ben said as he brushed a stray hair from his brow.

Grabbing his father's hand, he said, "I love you, Pa."

"I love you too, sweetheart."

Joe closed his eyes and almost immediately fell into a deep sleep.

Ben just sat there and watched Joe sleep. He stayed with Joe for a while and then left him to sleep.

Hop Sing had been bustling around the house. He wanted to make sure everything was perfect. Not that the house wasn't already in tiptop shape, but he was just so happy that _his_ number three son was home.

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Adam found himself at the lake just staring out at the water. Hoss and Paul Martin had only been a few minutes behind Ben and himself. He left Jesse with Hoss and Hop Sing as their father and Paul took care of Joe.

He leaned back against the rock and closed his eyes. _How could I have been so unfair to Joe? It wasn't his fault the timber contract did not go through_, Adam thought to himself. Shaking his head, he felt a tear roll down his cheek.

He was remembering that day they fought, the day Joe left.

_Two years earlier!_

_Adam flew into the yard, furious. They were counting on that timber contract to make up for some loss with the mines and cattle, or at least he was. He wasn't sure just how Cooper got it, but he did, and that made Adam even more livid._

_He hated that man! He knew Dave Cooper was behind the accident at the mines, but couldn't prove it and he was sure he had something to do with rustling the cattle. One hundred head of prime cattle to be exact, but he couldn't prove that either._

_His temper smoldered most of the morning when he found out they had lost the bid. He looked around the barn and noticed that Joe was still not back from where ever the kid was. Oh, that brat gets away with too much._

_Just as he was thinking that, he heard Joe in the yard and the verbal attack began. _

"_Hey Adam" Joe was all smiles holding up the catch of fish. "Check it out."_

"_Just what the hell are you doing fishing when there's work to be done?" bellowed Adam. _

_The smile quickly faded as Joe just stopped and looked at his brother. "I finished MY work and decided to go fishing." _

_The snotty tone was not missed by Adam and he could feel his anger growing. _

"_What's your problem today anyways?" asked Joe. Adam had been a bear all week, thought Joe._

_Adam narrowed his eyes. He decided to go in the house before it turned into something bad. Too late! _

_Joe's next comment could not have come at a worse time. Little did he know he hit the nail right on the head. "What'd you do, lose a contract or something?" _

_At that Adam turned and grabbed Joe roughly by the arm and threw him backwards so hard that he hit the side of the barn, knocking the wind out of him._

_Gasping for air, he wheezed, "What the hell is your problem?" _

"_YOU! WHY DON'T YOU ACT LIKE THE MAN YOU KEEP SAYING YOU ARE INSTEAD OF THE SPOILED BRAT YOU REALLY ARE?" screamed Adam_

_Joe had never seen Adam so angry. "Leave me alone!" was all he said and tried to turn away from him, only to have Adam swing him back around. _

"_DON'T TURN YOUR BACK ON ME!" Adam's face was beet red with fury._

"_I have nothing more to say to you, Adam, YOU ARE NOT MY FATHER!" Now Joe was yelling at the top of his lungs._

"_You can be thankful for that. I would have nailed your hide years ago." "Pa's way too lenient with you. All you do is whine and complain!" "GOD, YOU CAN BE SO DAMN USELESS SOMETIMES!" "YOU NEVER STOP TO THINK ABOUT THINGS BEFORE YOU DO THEM, AND THEN IT'S UP TO EVERYONE ELSE TO BAIL YOU OUT OF TROUBLE!"_

_Adam was screaming so loud by now that Joe felt tears coming to his eyes. He couldn't believe Adam was saying all this to him. He wouldn't give Adam the satisfaction so he turned to leave. _

_Once more Adam grabbed at him. Joe went to push Adam off but just as he did, Adam balled up his fist and slammed Joe in the jaw._

_Hoss appeared at that point and grabbed Adam from behind pinning his arms at his sides._

_Joe lay stunned for a moment. He rose from the ground and screamed, "I HATE YOU, AND AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, YOU ARE NO BROTHER OF MINE!"_

_Before Hoss could get to him, Joe jumped on Cochise and road away as fast as he could, never looking back! He was so stung by Adam's words he was literally shaking, with tears burning his eyes. _

_It was late, in the evening when Hoss got home. He had looked everywhere he could think of for the boy, but to no avail. Hoss didn't realize that Adam was doing the very same thing. _

"_Where is that kid?" Adam said. "I've gotta find him." Unfortunately, Adam got the same results as Hoss. _

Adam opened his eyes, realizing it was late. The tears were flowing freely down his face. As he mounted up to go home, he shook his head. _God, I how could I have been such an ass!_ And yet he was the one who apologized to me first, he thought.

"I wouldn't blame the kid if he really did hate me!" Adam said to himself. Sighing, he headed for home.

Dr. Martin was getting ready to leave and he told Ben not to worry. "You have a healthy little granddaughter there, Ben!" he said with a smile. "Joe's going to be fine too, just let him sleep. Being both physically and emotionally exhausted, he just needs plenty of rest!"

Ben left Joe to sleep, although he noticed it was a fitful slumber. _He must be dreaming, _thought Ben. _I hope it's a pleasant one! But somehow he didn't think it was!_

_Call me a spoiled brat will he, well I'll show him. Adam, it's always Adam. He had such a good day until he ran into HIM! He finished breaking the rest of the horses for the Army early, so he figured he'd get some fishing in and have an early night…… boy he couldn't have been more wrong!_

_He wasn't even paying attention as he road along, Cochise just seemed to trot along as if he knew where he was going. He was wandering aimlessly most of the day and night!_

_He didn't think of his father and he didn't think of Hoss. He didn't think of anything except his anger towards Adam. He meant what he said to him; at least he did at the time._

_He found himself in a town called Gold Hill the next mornin. It was a small town just outside of Carson City, actually not far from Virginia City. _

_He went to find something to eat, not that he was really hungry anyway. Thank god he had about a hundred dollars that he had won at poker a couple of nights ago._

_It was only then he realized he had left with only the clothes on his back! _

"_Oh well that's all right," he said out loud. "After I get something to eat, I'll go look for a job. If there is anything available in this town."_

_He saw a sign that said, "HIRING" at the Yellow Jacket Mine! Oh how I hate working in the mines, he thought to himself. As he walked past the St. John's Episcopal Church, he saw this beautiful girl sitting in front of the church talking to another girl._

"_Well, if anything they have pretty girls here." he smiled to himself. He walked towards the girls and introduced himself. As he got closer, he thought, wow, she really is beautiful._

"_Hello, my name's Joe, Joe Cartwright." _

_She smiled at him, and said, "I'm Katie McFadden" _

_As he kissed her hand, she thought what a gentleman and a good-looking one at that. Her friend just smiled at the two of them._

"_This is my friend Tina James." _

"_Pleasure to meet you," said Joe, kissing her hand also. Oh boy, Tina mimicked her friends' thoughts, what a gentleman._

"_I was wondering where a fellow could get something_ _to eat?"_

_Katie answered, "There's the Gold Hill Saloon just down the street. I'm heading that way so I could show you if you want."_

_Tina just smiled as she bid her friend good-bye and watched them walk away. Well it looks like Katie got lucky. Maybe she can get out of this god-forsaken town, she thought._

"_That would be just fine Ms. McFadden," he said. _

"_Please call me Katie." _

_As they walked along, they found they actually had a lot in common. She liked to fish and ride. She also loved to read poetry and for a brief moment he thought about Adam. The anger started to come back, but only briefly._

"_Do you live here in town?" he asked. _

"_Yes I live with my grandfather on the outskirts of town. We have a small place with some horses that my grandfather sells to the some of the miners as well as people just passing through." "Are you just passing through, Joe Cartwright?"_

"_I'm not sure, I'm looking for work," he said. "I really don't want to work in the mines! "Do you know if there is anything else for work in this town?" _

_She caught her breath. "Yes. My grandfather is looking for someone to help him with the horses because he really can't do it anymore," she stated._

_Joe couldn't believe his luck. "Well, lead the way!" he said, smiling. _

_She smiled back and they both talked away on the way to her house._

_William McFadden was sitting on the porch of the small house when he saw his granddaughter walking towards him with a young man. His eyes narrowed as they neared him. Mmmm " just who is this young man?" he thought to himself._

"_Good morning Grandfather," she said, and then kissed his cheek. _

"_Good morning, child" he said with a strong Scottish brogue._

"_Grandfather, this is Joe Cartwright. He's looking for work and has experience with horses." He heard his granddaughter say._

"_Hello, young man!" he said. _

"_Hello, sir" said Joe, shaking the man's hand. Boy he's got a strong grip, thought Joe. _

_Mmmm, a boy with manners, thought William._

_They all went inside, had some breakfast, and talked. William found he really liked this young boy. He had heard of Ben Cartwright and wondered if this was his son, but figured if the boy wanted him to know he would tell him! So he hired him._

_After several of months, William could see the two were falling in love. He remembered his lovely wife Rachel, as she was the same age that Katie is now and he had been like Joe._

_He saw that Joe was a hard worker. He knew the boy would be able to support his granddaughter if they married. Which he was pretty sure would happen._

_One day they went fishing and Katie noticed Joe wore a far away look on his face. "Joe is something wrong?" _

"_No sweetheart," he answered. Everything's just fine," he said. Then leaned over and kissed her passionately. "Katie, will you marry me?" he asked nervously. He held his breath when she didn't say anything at first and then she burst into tears. _

"_Yes, yes Joe…I will marry you," she said in an excited voice. "I love you Joe Cartwright." _

_They just held each other for a moment. _

"_And I love you Katie McFadden." _

_They made love to each other right there. Joe had never felt anything like this before. _

_Katie had tears of joy when they both told her grandfather the news. He just smiled for he knew it would happen. He had never seen his granddaughter so happy._

_Katie and Joe said they just wanted a justice of the peace in order to get married right then. _

"_If that's what you want then that's what you will have," said William smiling._

_It was a short while later that Katie was with child. Joe was over the moon. The time flew by so fast it made his head spin._

_One morning Katie woke up feeling funny. "Joe," she called to him almost in a panic._

_Joe came running into the room. "What's wrong?" he asked. _

"_The baby," she said, holding her stomach. "It's to early," she cried._

"_It's okay sweetie, just hold on," said Joe._

_William went for the doctor as fast as he could._

_Joe stayed with her, holding her hand until he got there. Once the doctor arrived he ushered both men out of the room._

_Joe was pacing the floor for what seamed like hours. _

_William noticed the tears in his eyes. "It's okay, son," he said. _

"_It's too early, five weeks early. It's to early," Joe kept saying. _

_William was about to say something when they both heard a baby crying. They both froze and held their breath. The doctor came out a short while after and told them they had a beautiful little girl._

_She was small but healthy, the doctor told them, and the mother is just fine, a little tired, but fine. _

_It was the first time in awhile that Joe thought about his father and brothers, even Adam, but just shook his head. He wasn't sure they'd want him back after all this time. And he was definitely sure Adam wouldn't._

_As time went on Joe marveled at that little life, part of his life._

_Katie told him, "The older she gets the more she looks like her daddy!" _

_Jesse was about fourteen months old and running everywhere._

_Joe missed his family fiercely and Katie sensed it. She told him to contact his family, but Joe was never so scared in his life._

_His world started to crumble when cholera hit the small town. Joe feared for his family. William and Joe did what they could to help, but then Katie got sick. _

_Joe prayed as hard as he could, but she was taken from him shortly after she got sick._

_His first real love, his wife, the mother of his child, and now she was gone._

_Joe thought he was going to die. "God I need my Pa!" he thought, as he sat there holding a sleeping Jesse in his arms. _

_William had finally talked Joe into getting a hold of his family. He knew the boy needed his family now more than ever. Joe was going home!_

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Joe woke, startled. "Jesse?" he said, looking around the room, a little confused. Once he got his bearings and realized where he was, he relaxed a little.

Sitting up in bed, he rubbed the sleep away. _"Ten o'clock in the morning, boy I must_ _have been really tired,_ he thought. He realized he was still in his regular clothes. "I need to get some fresh clothes to change into," he said out loud.

Just as he said that, Ben knocked at the door. "Joe are you up?" he asked, walked into the room. "Good morning son, how are you feeling this morning?"

"Good, Pa," he said with a big yawn! Then he giggled. "Sorry, Pa," he said.

"It's good to hear you laugh. Are you going to sleep all day, or come down and get something to eat?" asked Ben, smiling.

"I just need to get changed and I'll be right down. Where is Jesse?" he asked.

"Oh she needed to help Hoss with the chores!" stated Ben with a hearty laugh. "She sure reminds me of you, when you were the same age" Ben said, smiling at his son. "You always needed to do everything your brothers did." _God it was good to have his baby back! _ "Well I'll be waiting down stairs. Come down when you're ready."

As Joe watched his father leave he realized for the first time in awhile that he felt a sense of security. For both his daughter and himself.

As he was getting changed, he heard Adam, Hoss and Jesse downstairs.

"Utoh." He heard her say. _I think that's her favorite saying,_ he thought, smiling.

"Well, I better go see my little angel!"

As he made his way downstairs, he saw Jesse sitting in Adams lap as he tied her shoe for her.

"Tank you" she said, and kissed him on the nose, which made Adam laugh.

"You…..are…..wel…..come," he said, poking her in the ribs as he pronounced each syllable.

She was giggling so hard she was crying. Then she spied Joe at the bottom of the stairs, and squealed "Daddy" with her arms out for him to take her. "Doe fissin," she said, as she bounced up and down in his arms.

"So you want to go fishing, do you?"

"Yeah," she answered, her head bobbing up and down. "Gampy doe too!" she said, pointing towards Ben.

As Ben stepped forward, he took the child. Throwing her in the air and catching her again, she squealed with such delight. "So you want to go fishing, a fishing we will go!" he stated.

Hoss spoke up, "I have to check on the cattle this morning, but I'll meet you there for lunch!"

Adam laughed and said, "Leave it to you to show up right when it's time to eat!"

Everyone laughed.

Adam was getting ready to leave. "I have some business in town, but I'll be back early!" He put his hand on Joe's neck, giving him a small squeeze, and smiled at him.

Joe reached up and grabbed his forearm with his left hand, and returned the smile. He felt the love that had always been there it never left! He knew they would talk later.

The lake was beautiful; the water was calm and crystal clear. The autumn air was crisp. Joe was showing his father a picture of Katie as Jesse was running around trying to "tatch a fog" as she put it.

"She was beautiful," Ben said as he handed the photo back to Joe. He put his hand on Joe's back to offer his support.

"I….I.. never knew what you went through Pa. I never understood before…n..never knew what you felt." he stopped as his voice faltered and whipped the tears that formed.

"Joe, I know sometimes there are no words to offer comfort, time is the only thing for that. But that," he said, pointing to Jesse "is the greatest treasure Katie could have given you!" "She's a part of Katie that you will always have. A precious gift that can never be replaced." He paused as he watched the child squatting and looking at something. That something suddenly jumped, causing the child to move back quickly and fall on her back side, giggling.

Joe listened to his fathers' words as he watched his little angle running and laughing. _"She's got Katie's laugh,"_ he said to himself. Joe understood what his father was saying.

He heard her say "Unca Hoss"

Smiling at Ben, Joe said, "It must be lunch time."

Ben looked at his watch and said, "right on time," laughing as he slapped Joe's back. "Come on boy, let's get something to eat."

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Hop Sing had out done himself with supper that night. There was pork roast, mashed potatoes, peas, squash and fresh rolls. The laughter could be heard throughout the house.

Hop Sing was in the kitchen listening to _his_ family and smiling away. _Good to have little_ _boy back,_ he thought to himself, _and number one grandchild._

He was just about to bring the peach cobbler out when Jesse came in.

"Hop Sin need me?" she asked, with the most beautiful smile.

Hop Sing laughed and gave her some napkins to take out.

As they finished supper, Ben settled in his favorite chair and lit his pipe. Just as he did that Jesse crawled up in his lap, reaching up and trying to grab the smoke rings as they floated up in the air.

The boys went to the barn to take care of some chores. They joked and picked on each other just like before.

_God how I missed this,_ thought Joe. It was the first time since Katie's death that he felt so happy. It felt good to laugh. Even when Hoss threatened to dump him in the water trough for the comment he made about Bessie Sue.

Grabbing Joe by his slim waste and swinging him around, he said, "wadda ya think Adam? I think Little Joe needs a soaking!" He had the biggest smile on his face.

Adam was just laughing at the look on Joe's face. The boy was laughing hysterically, begging Hoss to put him down.

After they finished, Joe left the barn to go for a walk. Hoss went back to the house and Adam paused for a moment before following Joe.

Joe was standing at the corral watching the horses just milling around. He didn't hear Adam come up behind him.

As Adam put his hand on Joe's shoulder, he let out a yelp and just about jumped out of his skin.

Adam smiled " Sorry Joe, I didn't mean to startle you!" he said.

"That's okay, I just didn't hear you," he stated with his hand over his heart. "Adam…."

Adam stopped him by putting his hand over Joe's mouth and shook his head. "No Joe, you don't need to apologize. I'm the one who needs to do that! I…." He stopped as his voice faltered. "I am so sorry. I had no right to do and say the things I did." He paused and started again, "I was having a bad day and took it out on you. I know it's no excuse but that's what happened and… and I'm sorry, I hope you can forgive me." He could feel the mist in his eyes. "I would give anything to relive that day, to take it all back, but I can't!" Adam stopped for a bit because he didn't think he could say any more without completely breaking down. Then he continued, "I was so scared when I couldn't find you and believe me I looked everywhere," Adam closed his eyes, trying to control his emotions. He opened them when Joe started to speak.

"A.. Adam, I never meant the things I said either, I don't hate you and I could never hate you. I don't even know why I said it!" Now Joe had tears in his eyes. He put his head down for a minute before looking his brother in the eyes. "I love you, Adam and I'm proud to have you as my brother!" Joe said with a shaky voice.

Adam pulled him into his arms "I love you too kid, please forgive me?" His voice was full of emotion.

"Let's just forget it!" said Joe with a small smile.

"No, let's remember it, so it doesn't happen again," said Adam, looking into his brother's eyes, and giving his neck a gentle squeeze.

They both smiled at each other and leaned on the corral fence talking things out.

It had been too long, thought Adam, and he was going to make sure it NEVER happened again!

Ben and Hoss had been standing on the porch watching Joe and Adam.

"Those two are going to be fine!" Ben stated to Hoss. Hoss smiled and turned to go in the house while his father stayed and watched a few minutes more.

Ben tuned to walk in the house before taking a look back. _Just fine,_ he thought to himself, smiling.

His thoughts were interrupted by a small voice. "Gampy, c'mon." As he turned, there was Jesse, waving for him to come in.

He picked her up and headed inside to read the story he promised her. He took one last look at his boys and smiled as he stepped inside, closing the door behind him…

The End…

Notes: Gold Hill was established 1851 a sister city to Virginia City-Online Nevada Encyclopedia.

The Yellow Jacket Mine, staked in 1859 was one of the deepest in the Comstock Lode, at one point reaching down 3054 feet. – Mathewson – IGT knowledge Center – University of Nevada


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